Two Reasons Haircuts are Good for My Mental Health

"What are we going to do about your curls?"

I looked up at Kelly from behind the magazine I was reading.  Her eyes were focused on my daughter's beautiful spiral curls, but her words were meant for me. 

"I don't have curly hair," I replied.

"Yes you do."

A specially trained curly hair stylist, Kelly and I had met through a mutual friend who had taken one look at my daughter's hair and sent out an SOS.  My daughter has beautiful hair just like her Aunt Leigh and Great-Aunt Jo on my husband's side of the family, but we had no idea how to take care of it.  Kelly was quickly taking care of that! 

"You definitely have curl in your hair, Lisa.  Let me show you," Kelly said indicating with a nod that I should head back to the sinks.  I was met there by her assistant.  Thus began a new relationship between me and my newly discovered naturally curly hair . . . and a new line item squeezed into our household budget under Lisa's 5ks . . . Lisa's Hair. 

Prior to meeting Kelly, if you would have asked me what my least favorite physical feature about myself was I would have been torn between my chin fat and my hair.  I have never liked my thin lifeless hair.  As a result, I didn't worry about it much.  It was just there.  Haircuts were at the bottom of my To Do List.  If it was a crazy week, I'd cancel and reschedule.  No big deal.  But now, after learning a new way to wash and dry my hair, I absolutely LOVE the fun bouncy mass of curls on my head!  I consider my routine visits to Kelly Elaine Inc an important part of maintaining my Mental Health!  Crazy week?  Too bad - I'm getting my haircut!  Here are the two reasons why:

1) I feel better about myself.  Let me be honest - I know that I should be happy with the body (including my hair) that God gave me; however, how I look impacts how I feel about myself which impacts my confidence which impacts my day.  I live with my hair everyday.  For most of my life every time I looked in the mirror I would say to myself - "I don't like my hair."  In my chubbier years when I didn't have a full length mirror in my house I still had to look at my hair several times a day. 

 

Over the years I had great stylists who gave me great haircuts, I just didn't like the hair that they had to work with.  By introducing me to a new wash/dry routine and more natural hair care products, Kelly helped me discover that I have great hair.  Fitness Reloaded founder Maria Brilaki wrote in her blog, "Not liking how your body looks . . affects you everyday.  Becoming friends with the mirror means a huge boost in how you feel everyday."  Now when I look in the mirror at the natural hair God gave me I say to myself  "I love my hair!" with great enthusiasm.  I feel so much better about myself which impacts my confidence which impacts my day.  I can be having a crappy day; yet, when I wash my hands in the bathroom I can look in the mirror and find at least one good thing - my hair!  (I'm still working on the chin fat - but one thing at a time!)

2) I have the positive anticipation of a stress relieving hour-long vacation every 6-8 weeks.  In my life I am always needing to have a Plan B.  If Jamison doesn't feel well and can't drive the kids to school, then I will call my friend Emily.  If a member of my staff calls off, then I will call Tiffany to help me cover home care assignments.  If I can't get home in time to pick-up JJ from practice, then I will call my dad to help me.  I call that Negative Anticipation.  Always anticipating what could go wrong and being ready to deal with it.   All of this Negative Anticipation can really weigh me down if I let it.  So I've found that making sure I am including Positive Anticipation in my life to be vital to reducing stress and maintaining my sanity.  One thing I positively anticipate every 6-8 weeks?  Getting my haircut!

It is important to say at this point that Kelly owns one amazing salon - Kelly Elaine Inc (https://www.facebook.com/KellyElaineInc)!  She offers free beverages from pop to wine to beer.  Her cats and dog are there to greet you.  For animal lovers, it is very relaxing to have a cat curl up in your lap!  During the warmer months, you can sit outside on her private soothing

patio and let the sun dry your hair rather than sit under the dryer.  Plus, Kelly and her assistance Victoria are a complete riot!  They make you feel welcome and have you in hysterics before you even sit down!  And - her prices make it possible for me to fit my appointments into our tight budget with just a little squeeze.  Stepping into her salon is like a mini-vacation . . . a brief escape from the realities of my life.  I leave feeling refreshed and energized.  In my opinion, how you feel about the salon you are going to and the person cutting your hair is just as important as how you feel about the cut and style you walk out the door with.

Are you in need of a vacation but can't afford to get away?  Could you use a break from your daily routine?  Have you been feeling BLAH?  Pick up the phone and make a hair appointment - it's a great mental health treat!

Here are some fun pics to show off Ellie and my curls.  These are from our first visit to Kelly Elaine Inc back in January 2012.


Ellie before her cut & style

Ellie after her cut & style



Me after my wash & style

 



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Check out the new book that I am a part of . . . INSPIRE!  Available on Amazon through my author page - Lisa Hamer Jenkins.



Such a Simple Task - Why Don't I Do It More Often???

Three words. 

Cut up fruit.

Such a simple task.  It literally takes seconds to cut up an apple.  Not much longer to rinse off a handful of cherries and put them in a baggie.  Minutes to slice a watermelon or cantaloupe. 

So why don't I do it more often? 

When I am packing my lunch in the morning, I'm always in a rush.  So I end up grabbing my pre-packaged cheese crackers and my low-fat yogurt.  (Today I actually grabbed the entire pound-size bag of pretzels and stuck it in my purse!)  Meanwhile, the fruit I bought with good intentions sits and rots on my counter or in my fridge.

Tonight I put my good intentions into action.  I washed the delicious looking bright-red cherries I bought and put them in several small baggies.  I sliced the watermelon I bought and prepared a container for me to put in my lunch leaving the rest for my family to inhale tomorrow.  I set out a washed Pink Lady Apple along with the apple slicer and a baggie so the apple is ready to be cut at the last minute tomorrow morning.

It's a tip I hear all the time - prep your food ahead of time so that you can grab the healthier snacks just as easily as the pre-packaged ones.  It makes perfect sense and it is so easy!  I hope that my action steps tonight lead to successful snacking tomorrow which will lead to future nights of fruit prepping!

Happy Snacking!

Pass the Tums . . . My To-Do List is Giving Me Heartburn!



Here I am on yet another Sunday evening, the conclusion of a fantastically fun weekend filled with a good balance of work and play, and I am popping antacids while reviewing a To Do List that has four times more untouched items than crossed off items.  There are things on this list that have been there for months.  It feels like no matter how hard or how many hours I work, I just can't get everything done.

A perfect illustration from this morning - I finally got to the point where I was not setting a foot in the shower until I scrubbed it!  When I pulled out the tile cleanser it was covered with a thick layer of dust!  I literally had to clean off the bottle of cleanser before I could clean the shower.  How disgusting is that?  Obviously, "scrub shower" has been a long-time member of the "Things-Lisa-REALLY-Needs-To-Do-but-Never-Seems-to-Get-Around-to-Doing Club."

Back to my current rapid heart beat and rising anxiety - As I looked over my List, I remembered that when I bent over to get the tile cleanser, I noticed my magazine basket - also covered with a layer of dust.  In the moment, I quickly sorted through it tossing most of it's contents in the trash.  Just now I went back and retrieved the March 2014 issue of O that I had carelessly tossed.  Written in large print across the cover - De-Clutter Your Life 2014 - O's annual guide to clearing some space in your head, your heart, your sock drawer.  Peter Walsh, my most favorite professional organizer, shares 12 rules for de-cluttering.  I found a very helpful tip for my perpetually never-ending To-Do List in Rule No. 6: FINISH THE CYCLE.

Consider your washing machine: You'd never fill it with dirty clothes, let it run for 20 minutes, then turn it off and let the clothes sit for two days.  That would create a stinky mess!  So it is with our daily routines: Doing things halfway wreaks havoc.
That's why it is important to finish each cycle. (page 113)

Peter Walsh

I'm a bad finisher.  I'm a great starter, but I struggle with wrapping things up.  Look at the example I just gave you.  I set out to scrub the shower, saw the magazine basket and before I truly thought about what I was doing, I was sorting through the magazines.  Now I did finish the cycle with the shower (it was THAT bad that I could ignore it no longer), but I can look at the projects I set out to complete this weekend and see unfinished steps along the way.  I sorted through my clothes organizing my closet and dresser drawers.  It looks great!  However, what is laying on the floor in front of my dresser right at this moment and therefore preventing me from crossing it off my List? The pile of clothes that I am donating to Goodwill.  I can't even remember what stopped me from putting the final touch on that project.  Now, because I am thinking about this problem of mine I will go down to the basement, bag it and take it to my car, but I bet it sits in my trunk for weeks before I actually stop and drop it off.  Nope - I'm turning over a new leaf - I'm going to drop it off tomorrow.  I need to finish the cycle. 

By finishing the cycle, I will complete more items on my List rather than starting five tasks and completing zero.  It sounds simple but it makes sense.  It sounds simple but I know I'm going to have to work hard to change me ways.

 

I actually have multiple To Do Lists - one for home, one for work and one for me.  My Daily Me List always includes the same items:

• Time with God
• Exercise
• Kids Exercise
• Time with my hubby
• List three things I'm grateful for (I've been working hard to keep my Negative Nellie side under control!)

I confess that I don't always get each one crossed off every day.  I try and some days that's the best I can offer.  Maybe with a new focus of finishing the cycle, I won't be so stressed out by my other two To Do Lists and I'll have time and energy to get to these five tasks every day.  After all, I learned several years ago that . . .





 

 

 



Check Your Boob Bounce!

Friends ~ The next time you get dressed to go exercise pause in front of the mirror.  Do five jumping jacks.  What are your boobs doing?  If they are wildly bouncing all over the place practically smacking you in the face you need to ask yourself a very important questions - Does my sports bra fit?  Are you even wearing a SPORTS bra?

In my mind, the sports bra is one of the most important pieces of exercise gear you will purchase.  How can a person possibly focus on the task at hand when her boobs are flying all over the place?  Plus, don't they hurt when you're done?  When I'm in a class that has a mirror or I'm crossing the finish line of a 5k, I'd rather people see me and think "Oh, hi Lisa."  Not, "Holy cow look at her boobs!"  They really need to be contained - for your sake and for those around you. 

Unfortunately, besides being one of the most important pieces of exercise gear, sports bras can be one of the more expensive pieces of exercise gear.  What totally stinks about that is that no one is most likely ever going to see it!  We Oooooh! and Aaaaaah! over each other's colorful new shoes, but I'm not going to walk into class and flash everyone to show off my new bra.  Ladies - they are worth the money.  You don't need very many.  Like I said, no one is going to see it so if you rinse it out and wear the same bra again tomorrow no one is going to know.  Sports bras do end up on clearance racks at stores like Target, Old Navy or Dick's so if you are on a tight budget like me you can still get a good one.  Marshall's and TJMaxx are also great places to find sports bras at a decent price. 

Another issue with sports bras is proper fit.  You may think that your boobs are under control, but there is a strong possibility that they are having their own dance party right under your nose and you don't even know it.  My friend Melanie recently posted this great article to her facebook page which gives step by step instructions for measuring yourself for a sports bra www.womensrunning.competitor.com/2014/06/shoes-gear/bosom-buddies_25388  It's a quick read with good suggestions.  You can also stop by a department store and ask to be fitted for a bra.  It doesn't cost anything and there is no commitment to buy a bra from that store.  I was recently fitted and was shocked at how far off I was on size.  It didn't take long, and while it was a little awkward, the lady was very nice. 

This topic has been on my mind for some time.  I feel bad when I'm running or dancing next to someone and all I can think is "Man, she really needs a new sports bra."  I don't want to think about your boobs - I want to think about you and cheer you on and have fun!  Plus, I can't be the only one noticing this.  So - five jumping jacks in front of the mirror.  It will only take you a minute to check your boob bounce. 

A2Z: Getting There Without Turning Around Along the Way

This is the message that is drilled into our heads in today's instant gratification focused world, but I have a problem with it.  There are words missing.  Important words that as a result of being omitted cause many people to lose hope, stop believing and eventually give up on their dream.  This quote should read:

Think big, dream big, believe big and the results

(after a lot of hard work, many failures and
countless small victories)

will be big.

 

Don't get me wrong, there are many people who have the extreme drive or simply the luck to leap from point A to point Z in a single bound.  That is not me.  How many ideas have I had that I have taken the time to sit down and write out that have never made it off the paper?  How many times was a new diet "the one" that would melt away my extra pounds?    How many times have I cleaned off my kitchen counter proclaiming that it will never be piled with junk again?  (OK - that one may not seem too "big" to you, but it is a big dream in my house.)

 

Why is it that I have the dream or the idea, but as soon as it doesn't happen right away or the way I thought it would, I give up?

 

1) I FEEL like a failure.  I have the image in my mind of victory and happiness - a big celebration!  When something doesn't turn out the way I've imagined it in my head, my excitement is deflated.  Instead of the bubbly happy feeling, I feel like I have a rock in the pit of my stomach.  I don't like that feeling, so I'm not going to try again.

 

2) I'm too IMPATIENT.  I'm starting at Point A and am aiming for Point Z.  I don't want to travel through Point G or Point N or stop at Point T.  I want to get to Point Z and I want to get there now. That's why when I'm craving French fries I'm not going to go to the grocery store, buy a 10lb bag of potatoes, come home, wash them, slice them, season them and then wait while they bake in the oven.  No - I'm heading to the drive-thru! 

  

I find it so sad that many people are missing out on their BIG dreams because they give up. It IS possible to dream BIG and achieve BIG results.  We simply need to recognize that the path to accomplishing them is not one HUGE leap, but rather one filled with many SMALL steps.  For me, making two changes helped me find joy and achievement in taking many SMALL steps to find BIG results:

 

1) Celebrate every victory regardless of how small.  When I'm running and I get to the point that I don't think I can go any further, I'll set a small specific goal.  I will say to myself - "Lisa, run to that red mailbox" or "Lisa, finish this lap."  When I reach that mailbox or complete that lap, I'll raise my arms in victory or shout out "YES!"  (Yes, I do literally shout out loud.  Yes, I do get some strange looks.  No, I don't care.)  That small physical action of celebration pushes me to run to the next red mailbox or complete another lap.  I FEEL victorious!  That is a good feeling.  I celebrate every partial pound lost on the scale, every item crossed off my To Do List, every goal accomplished whether it is with a mental hi-five, a victory dance in my kitchen or a trip out for Fro-Yo with my family.  Celebrating helps me maintain a positive outlook.  It keeps me motivated to take the next small step needed to reach my ultimate goal.

 

2) Enjoy the journey.  I'm starting at Point A.  I want to get to Point Z.  I'm ready to hit the road and get this journey started.  Hey - wait a minute, I've never been to Point G.  This is a nice place!  Let's pause here and see what it's all about before we continue on.  If we are solely focused on the end result, we miss out on everything along the way.  One of my lifelong dreams has been to be a published author.  Last year I was presented with the opportunity to achieve that dream.  I honestly thought that I would hand in my manuscript and the next week be handed a shiny sweet-smelling hot-off-the-press book.  It doesn't work that way.  Publishing a book is a journey.  A couple of weeks ago as I sat around a table with my fellow authors laughing, sharing life experiences and building friendships, my breath was taken away.  What an AMAZING afternoon.  I was at Point G and I was soaking up every minute of it!  Had I given up when I realized that I wasn't jumping from Point A directly to Point Z, I would have missed out on this wonderful experience.   

 

My point is not that we should stop dreaming big.  I do believe that there is no limit to what I can accomplish.  It simply took me some time to figure out the best way for me to get there. 

 

We each have our own journey.  My path from Point A to Point Z is probably different from your path.  Though our paths have obviously crossed here.  If you are feeling a bit lost on your journey I invite you to join with me for a bit.  Try what worked for me to keep myself focused and moving forward - those two SMALL steps may be just what you need to find your BIG results! 



Life-Threatening or Life-Changing?

I was recently at lunch with a group of girlfriends.  A newer group of friends, we spent the afternoon excitedly sharing bits and pieces of our life stories.  One friend, talking about her work with families living with autism, shared a sentence that has really stuck with me . . .

The diagnosis is not life-threatening, but it is life-changing.

 

When my husband first began to experience the chronic pain that now engulfs his body 24 hours a day, we searched for the magic pill, magic injection, magic procedure that would take it away.  On the outside, a majority of aspects of our lives changed - He could no longer work.  I could no longer be a stay-at-home-mom.  We could no longer handle life on our own so we moved closer to family.  I had to learn new things like how to start the lawnmower, put air in my car tires (so silly, but it took me forever to figure that one out!) and throw a pitch.  On the inside, I continued to hold a tight grip to the thought that this would all be over soon and life would return to "normal."   

 

I kept waiting for life to go back to the way it was - back to the way that I had always dreamed it would be.  That is where I got stuck.

          That is where I got sad.

                    That is where I gained weight.

                              That is where I developed high blood pressure and anxiety.

                                        That is where I missed out on a lot of fun adventures.

                                                  That is where I let go of several friendships.

                                                             That is where I lost out on five years of my life.

                                                                        That is where I got really angry at God.

 

I had to come to realization that life was never going back to the way it was.  My husband's diagnosis was not life-threatening, but it was life-changing so I was going to have to change.  Why did no one ever mention that to me? 

 

Hope is important.  I won't lose the hope that someday God will heal my husband 100% - physically and mentally.  But I also can't sit around staring at him waiting for that moment to arrive.  My hope is now firmly placed on the knowledge that God has created me to be a strong intelligent woman who can handle this crazy life that He has designed for me. 

 

I finally discovered the need to shift my perspective four years ago.  It took time, lots of purposeful practice and encouraging self-talk, but life is now filled with unexpected gifts and adventures that I could never have dreamed up!  I am no longer mourning dreams lost, but celebrating the ones I never knew existed.  (Life is not perfect - I still have plenty of Boo-Hoo Moments, but that is ok.)

 

There are so many life events that can cause us to get "stuck."  Sometimes we can be stuck for a few days, weeks, months or -like me - years.  In those moments, I encourage you to ask yourself this simple question

Is this situation life-threatening or life-changing?

The answer will shift your perspective and take you in a direction you never dreamed of!



Google and Go Cooking Day Five: Forgotten Jambalaya

I have always wanted to try Jambalaya just because it looked like such a cool dish.  As you can imagine, I was very excited to see this recipe make my list.  Even though I knew my family would not like it, I had told myself I was making the first five recipes to appear on the screen regardless of what they were so my hands were tied . . . I was making Jambalaya. 

I wish that I could type all of these wonderful words letting you know how much I LOVED this dish, but I can't.  I didn't like it!  However, I can honestly tell you that I think it was simply my taste buds and not the dish.  I'm just not that into too many spices.  We can blame my mother (Sorry Mom!) who rarely even uses salt in her cooking. 

Don't let the fact that I didn't like it stop you from trying it . . .

Forgotten Jambalaya

Ingredients:
1 lb smoked sausage, cut into slices
1 lb chicken breasts (boneless, skinless), cut into pieces
1/2 lb shrimp, medium
2 tsp basil, dried
3 celery ribs, chopped
5 garlic cloves
2 green peppers, medium, chopped
1 onion, medium, chopped
1-1/2 tsp oregano
3 tsp parsley flakes, dried
1 can tomatoes, diced
1 can beef or chicken broth
1 can tomato paste
1/2 tsp cayenne pepper
1-1/4 tsp salt
Hot cooked rice

Directions:
* Combine the tomatoes. broth and tomato paste.  Stir in the celery, green peppers, onion, garlic and seasonings.  Stir in chicken and sausage.

* Cover and cook on low for 4-6 hours or until chicken is no longer pink.  Stir in shrimp.  Cover and cook 15-30 minutes longer or until shrimp turn pink.  Serve over rice.
www.tasteofhome.com

When I first checked out this recipe, I was thinking that it was going to be very expensive.  However, when I looked in my freezer I had some shrimp and sausage that were both left over from previous recipes.  That was perfect!  Knowing that my family was most likely not going to like this, I cut the recipe in half. 

Crockpot week is officially over!  This week, I am trying to eat as much of the food that is already in my fridge and freezer as possible.  After over four months . . . I am finally getting a new oven!  YAY!  My oven stopped working on Christmas Eve.  I've been cooking solely on my stove top and crockpot.  I cannot wait to bake a batch of oatmeal cookies and fudge brownies and lasagna and honey mustard chicken!

I hope I shared at least one recipe that you will want to try!