I didn't even make it out of the parking lot before I ripped open the bag and filled my mouth with a handful of the crunchy candies that slowly melt into smooth goodness.
Arriving at home, I tucked the store bag containing my secret stash behind the paper towels on my kitchen counter. As I cooked dinner while endlessly nagging my kids to practice their instruments, finish their homework and put the clothes away that had sat in laundry baskets in the middle of the family room for the past two days, I could escape the chaos by popping a few seconds of amazing in my mouth.
STOP!!! WHAT WAS I DOING?!?! I tied the store bag in a triple knot and stuffed it on the top shelf with my canned goods.
This morning as I was preparing our lunches, that hidden bag of M&Ms was burning a hole in my conscious. I wanted some really bad. But I had eaten too many already. But I couldn't just leave them there. One of the kids would find them and they would definitely eat the rest of the bag. Wait, my kids wouldn't be rummaging through the canned goods shelf looking for an after school snack. Or would they?
Then I remembered a former elderly client - Miss B (not her real name or initial) who's weight had ballooned to over 400 pounds. Miss B was confined to a wheelchair at that point due to her weight. Her daughter was needing to do more and more of her care because she simply couldn't do it. Humiliated by that, Miss B was determined to lose weight. One of her greatest joys in life was jelly beans. She would consume them by the pound! Miss B's son continued to buy her the big bags of jelly beans; however, what Miss B changed was how she ate her treat. When he brought her a new bag of beans, Miss B would divide them into baggies of ten beans. Everyday she allowed herself one bag. Some days she would throw all ten in her mouth at one time. Other days she would savor each jellybean individually making the treat last all day long. Overtime, Miss B lost nearly 100 pounds. She did a lot more than stop eating jellybeans by the pound, but what a great example of self-control and not depriving yourself of something you love.
For me, the problem wasn't that I had bought the bag of M&Ms. After all, there is absolutely NOTHING wrong with enjoying a chocolate treat! The problem was that I lacked the self-control to not eat the entire pound bag in under 12 hours.
So I got out my box of snack baggies and my 1/8 cup measuring cup. I divided the remaining M&Ms into the snack bags. I added pretzel snaps, raisins and mini-marshmallows to several of the bags making a fun snack mix. Two of the bags I left plain.
When I got to work, I sat the baggie next to my computer. Throughout the day I popped one or two M&Ms in my mouth. Sometimes biting into the crunch. Other times letting them melt on my tongue. With every enjoyable moment, I thought of Miss B, her jelly beans and how her example helped me turn my OOPS moment into a victorious YUM moment!