Wednesday, April 23, 2014

Stopping to Smell the Roses . . . or in this case the Teenage Boy Smell

This afternoon I was leaning against a rusty fence standing in the wet grass wearing my dress pants and dress shoes as a heavy wind whipped my hair across my face sending chills through my bones while I watched my son throw shot put for his junior high track team.  Suddenly it hit me . . . I'm standing here watching my son throw shot put for his junior high track team!!!!
Pre-Throw Pep Talk from the Coach.
My son is the kid in the purple sweatshirt.

One of my biggest insecurities in life is that I will not be a good parent.  I want my kids to grow up to love the Lord, have a happy family, enjoy being physically active more than they enjoy laying on the couch and maintain a little bit of silliness.  My prayer is that they work hard while constantly setting goals for themselves and that they are willing to try new things every once in a while.  I worry constantly that they won't see the example I am trying so hard to be for them with my own life.  I am so afraid that my mistakes and wrong choices will out-weigh my good ones in their minds.
JJ making his first throw of the Meet.

I realized today as I stood by that fence that JJ is seeing me.  Up until a few weeks ago he had never thrown shot put.  I don't even know if he had ever thought about the shot put.  He was coming off an incredible basketball season that had lasted over five months.  In the past, he's looked forward to being able to come straight home after school, dive on the couch and pick-up his video game controller.  This year was different.  JJ wanted to continue the daily workouts he was getting with basketball practice.  He wanted to continue to develop the newly visible muscles popping out on his legs and arms.  He wanted to continue hanging out with his friends and not coming home to hang out in his room.  Who cares if he had no idea exactly what he's doing on that field?  JJ wanted to have fun and keep active.  That's what I've been trying to drill into his brain for the past several years.  Somehow . . . even when I didn't realize it or think it was possible . . . he heard me! 

Life moves fast.  I go from work to home to activity to cooking to budgeting to driving to organizing to cleaning to . . . my mind is either buried in my To Do List or clouded with worry about the future. Today I realized that while I am constantly encouraging my children and telling them how proud I am of them, I need to stop and truly be in the moment.  I need to give myself the gift of celebrating the reality that I am a good parent.  My children are seeing the example that I am working so hard to be for them.  As the classic saying goes - I need to stop and smell the roses.  Or in this case the wet grass and teenage boy smell . . . two of the sweetest scents I know!

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